Avoiding overprotection starts from a young age. Let the child explore, know; let us let him fall, comfort him when he hurts himself, and help him get up so he can continue learning ...
Let the child face his difficulties from an early age. Has to develop the skills by yourself. If he wants a toy, let him go and get it, let's not bring it to him; If he wants something that another child in the park also wants, or another child took the toy from him, let him go and ask for it, let's not solve the situation for him.
We must encourage learn to think for himself. You have to ask him the reason for things, what does he think ... If he doesn't want to face a new learning, let him see that this is not optional, that even if he doesn't like it, it is something that he will have to do. Playing new sports or activities that involve a certain effort, perseverance and routine will also help. To do activities with other children in which adults are not always on top.
It is important not give them everything they ask for. Sometimes there are parents who don't even wait for their children to open their mouths. They provide them with everything they think they might like or would have liked to have when they were little. Children have to learn the value of things, effort and money. When they want something, they have to see that it is not given to them immediately, that they have to make an effort, that they have to earn it. Sometimes there will be things that no matter how much they want and ask for them, they will not get them because parents do not find them appropriate, or because they are not designed for children of their age.
Children must have a bond with their parents that gives them security, stability, but a healthy bond, not one of absolute dependence. We encourage that from an early age they create positive bonds with other family members, grandparents, uncles, close friends, and that they are able to stay with them from time to time. In consultation, we see children for whom it is a drama to be one day separated from their parents, and who miss school activities, such as farms, cultural weeks, study trips ... due to the impossibility of sleeping away from home because they don't feel safe if their parents are not with them.
They need to learn and train to deal with the rest of the conflict situations that will arise in social relationships throughout life. Let's not forget that children are prepared to do things on their own from a very young age, so:
- Do not feed him; let him eat alone even if he drops it.
- Do not dress him, even if it takes longer, that he dresses alone.
- Do not take the stroller if it is old enough not to go in it.
- Take off the diaper when appropriate, even at the risk that it will sometimes escape.
- For example, the pacifier is something for babies, a child of three years should not use it.
The article includes excerpts from the book 'We want happy children. What they never taught us'by Silvia Álava.
You can read more articles similar to How to educate autonomous and independent children, in the category of on-site autonomy.