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Mom, do you know I have a boyfriend?


My six-year-old daughter told me a few days ago: 'Do you know, Mom, that Miguel says he's my boyfriend?' We can even hear on many occasions how adults, half jokingly, ask children if they have a boyfriend or girlfriend.

This naive statement from my daughter helped me to talk with her about the difference between a friendship relationship and the natural attraction that one can feel towards someone. Why do children talk about boyfriends or girlfriends? Do they fall in love? D. José Luis Pedreira, psychiatrist and psychotherapist, points out that children do not fall in love before reaching puberty, since they are not yet biologically prepared to secrete the chemical substances that regulate physical attraction and they are not equipped to properly understand the condition of mutual choice that occurs in courtship.

Our little ones do not need to be reciprocated in their fantasy, perhaps the girl or boy chosen to be a boyfriend is completely unaware of their feelings. It seems more like an imitated behavior, a sociocultural influence, a game, since being someone's boyfriend is something that older people do when they show their affection, and they add to this of 'being a boyfriend' of someone when they feel a preference for someone friend or are comfortable living together and dealing with a child of a different sex.

It is not advisable to be surprised or worried about such statements, they are one of the many expressions or sexual games that children have. These feelings can be very useful to begin to guide our little ones on sexual issues, explain the love relationship that is established between two young people who kiss in the street and that will also wake up in them, give an explanation of why people They decide to join their lives and form a family, transcendent and important issues for the life of everyone.

Children should be taught to interpret their present and future feelings, through nurtured communication with us in which clear and sincere answers are given to their doubts, their feelings and relationships with others.

Patro Gabaldon. Editor of our site

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Video: Little Girl Is Pretty Darn Sure She Has a Boyfriend (December 2021).