Relationship of couple

Why would I rather go to work than stay with the children?


Whenever they ask me what I have learned from the adventure of the maternity, I answer the same thing: "Being a mother has taught me to be a better person." And it is that this experience has brought out the best in me, but also the worst. There are days that I feel bad because I'd rather go to work than stay with the children.

I remember the crazy desire I had to be a mother. Since I was in high school, it was clear to me that one day I would have children, so when I got pregnant with my first daughter I radiated happiness. My desired project was going to come true soon. I had a 'normal' pregnancy and a Birth without scares or complications but ... my state of enthusiasm disappeared when I got home with my baby.

The sleepless nights, the colic, her constant dependence on me, the Breastfeeding... Everything became a world for me and this was just beginning! And that's when I realized that taking care of children is more tiring than going to work, because as a study published in Frontiers in Psychology explains, being a mother involves physical work, but also a great high emotional exhaustion, and not only That is equivalent to having two and a half jobs.

And at this moment my great "enemy" appeared, guilt. I felt bad because I just thought that the requested four month of maternity + month of vacation (at what time!) Will pass quickly. I'd rather go to work than stay with the girl.

Going to my office meant leaving the confinement of the four walls in which I had gotten myself; It meant talking to peers and having conversations away from diapers, bottles, or after-school girls; it was having to think about what to wear every day; Going to work made me regain my 'freedom' and my 'life' for a few hours!

But not only that! She would rather do housework, take down the garbage, or go shopping than be at home trying to put the baby to sleep or bathe her. What was happening to me! He suffered parental burnout syndrome!

Burnout It is an English word that means burned. It is usually associated with labor terms, but lately psychologists talk about the burnout syndrome in parents to refer to those (who are many) who are saturated, exhausted and stressed with motherhood / fatherhood.

According to the study to which we have previously referred, 12.9% of the mothers interviewed and 11.6% of the fathers were diagnosed with this syndrome.

Reconciling work and personal life is not easy and, at times, it can overwhelm us and, what is worse, it can lead to depression. Before you get to this point, ask for help! Talk to your partner, ask a family member to help you with the children and find time to disconnect and recharge. Do not become a monpet mother, that is, a mother without real time for her!

The television commercials, the baby stores, the instagram photos of celebrities and bloggers ... Everyone insists on putting a lot of sugar in the role of being a mother, but the reality is very different. Motherhood is wonderful, special, unique, but above all indescribable.

Each woman experiences it in a different way, but with a common denominator: she has a B-side. Without wanting to take away your desire to embark on this exciting adventure and, putting a bit of humor in this situation, I would like to review with you those moments that could being taken from a film by Almodóvar, that many mothers live daily and that are not written in any book or post about motherhood.

1. Being a mother is the end of your 'sweet dreams'
And the thing is that sleeping until noon is over ... no! At 08.00 in the morning the whole family is on their feet, not to mention the times you have had to wake up throughout the night: "Mom, pee", "Mom, water", "Mom, snot", "Mom, I'm scared." Or when the little one gets into your bed, ahem, ahem, ahem.

2. Being a mother is showering with the door open
Remember those times when you came home from work exhausted and got in the shower to relax? You can keep doing it - getting under the shower - but you won't be alone. Your daughters will surely accompany you. They won't want to lose sight of you for a moment! Not to mention the time to sit on the toilet. Is there anything more surreal than peeing while you have your child on your lap?

3. Being a mother is being a follower of all children's programs
To your repertoire of favorite series -Friends, Walking Dead, The Handmaid's Tale- you will join the universe of Fox, Pixar, Disney or Warner. And it is that, with children at home, the power of command almost always falls on them. I'm wrong?

4. Being a mother is eating "leftovers"
What did you do at home with the leftover food on Saturday? What was their destiny? Don't you remember anymore? Those "leftovers" were prepared by your mother for the next day, because because she didn't throw them away and since no one wanted them, she ate them. And, things in life, it is something that you also do now. Who was going to tell you!

5. Being a mother is carrying XXL bags
Gone are those handbags that you liked so much, now on your shoulder hangs a maxi where your things and your children's things fit: toys, spare clothes, something in case they get hungry or thirsty ... Not even Mary's Poppins gave so much!

But above all, something that many times we forget to tell future moms: being a mother is the greatest and best experience a woman can live. Do you agree? What is being a mother for you? Leave us a comment on this post, we will love to read you!

You can read more articles similar to Why would I rather go to work than stay with the children?, in the category of Relationship on site.


Video: Me2We - How to stay happily married in the 21st Century (October 2021).